Meredith

Dance with Me

(This is a transcript of Meredith’s story.)

I would just tell you that Jesus has wrecked my life in the best possible way. And in some of the worst possible ways. But more than anything, the best. For me to see his goodness and his faithfulness and His provision at every turn, because he is sovereign, and he is good. And he is faithful. And he does have a plan and a purpose for our good and for His glory. And that that can be is undeniable. It just is. You can rationalize it. You can ask questions about it. You can dismiss it. But if you really think about it, you can’t deny it. And you can’t rationalize it. Because it just is. It is the truth. It’s like the Fibonacci numbers.

So, there’s a naturally occurring sequence in nature that’s called the Fibonacci numbers. And it’s basically the way petals–the number of petals–on a flower, or the number of pine cone, pine cone … little things that are on a pine cone, they all line up. The number of keys on a piano keyboard. But it’s this undeniable thing that even scientists realize. It’s the Fibonacci numbers. It literally has a name by the person who discovered it, who said this pattern in nature occurs throughout all kinds of different manifestations of patterns, right in nature. And I would say, that’s a clear representation of God’s plan and God’s purpose that cannot be denied. And I’ve seen the Fibonacci numbers, in a sense, made manifest in my own life. He has a plan and a purpose that cannot be denied and will not be derailed either.

My story is, that I’m a leader. And sometimes when you lead, you don’t always get poured into. But when you lead, you need to have a place to get filled up. So then you can pour out and, and to really understand more of who I am–I am 37, I am single, I am a girl, I don’t have any kids. And living the single life here in Dallas can sometimes be really hard. You just get lonely. I have great friends, I have a great community, I have a great family. But Jesus and I have talked, been talking specifically over the last year and a half in some really deep places about singleness.

This experience that I had with Jesus happened last May. I went to the Upper Room on a Friday night. I actually walked in late, the set started. And the worship leader says, “I just feel like the Lord wants you to do something different than you normally would in worship. He wants you to have a sacrifice of praise. So if you are someone who is normally maybe sitting in your chair during worship, just having like a quiet moment with him, I feel like he’s maybe asking you to like stand up, maybe put your hands in the air. Or if you’re someone who dances in the back. Maybe he’s asking you to come and dance in the front. ” Give a couple different examples. And he said during this next song, “I just want you to do whatever you feel like would be a sacrifice of praise and worship to the Lord to maybe do something different, respond differently than you have in the past.” And so then I sat down and I said, “Jesus, what do you want me to do? How do you want me to respond?” And I distinctly heard in my heart, in my brain, in my thoughts, Jesus, say, the Holy Spirit say, “I want you to come and dance with me like a bride on her wedding day. I’m your husband, and I want you to come and dance with me.”

A year and a half talking to Jesus, about the intimate things and the hard things about being single, and then him asking you to come and dance with him on a wedding day that you may never see or experience, just wrecked me.

And I said, okay, but I thought to myself, that’s…I’m…I’ve got tears running down my face and I’m like, this is too intimate for me to do in front of all of these people.

A year and a half talking to Jesus, about the intimate things and the hard things about being single, and then him asking you to come and dance with him on a wedding day that you may never see or experience, just wrecked me.

So there’s this little back hallway that’s in the back of the sanctuary. And so I went in this little hallway, and I’m just kind of crying the whole time, and I just put my hands up and went back to my cotillion years and just started doing a box step with Jesus, just crying and just saying, “Okay, here I am,” kind of zoned out on the worship and zoned out on what’s going on around me. I’m sure I looked ridiculous. This girl with her eyes closed and crying and just dancing this box step when she says, just, you know, “Hey, Lord, what, you know, what else, like, is there something else you want to tell me or show me?” And he said, “I want you to put your head on my chest, and just relax into me and just stick with me.”

And so I just leaned my head forward. And for a moment, I felt like there was a chest that I was really putting my head on, and I just danced with Jesus and cried and experienced something with Jesus that I don’t know if I ever will get to experience in real life with a husband on my wedding day, and would have never asked Jesus to do with me. I would have never asked him to come and get with me like that. That’s and honestly–like in my personality. I’m actually not a very good dancer. And so even having dancing at my wedding, or dancing in front of a whole group of people with my husband isn’t even really something that appeals to me in any way. But Jesus knows me better, and asked me to come and do something with him that he knows and the deepest places of who I am, is something that I want,

And he wanted to do it with me.

And I experienced the love of God in a deep way–to be known, and to be seen, and to be loved and to experience something. It was powerful, and was life changing. And I will never forget to be known by God that way, so intimately, so uniquely, and also unexpectedly.

He will unexpectedly provide for you in ways that you didn’t even know that you needed to be provided for. And that’s really fun, kind of scary sometimes, because I’m sure I looked ridiculous. But I wouldn’t change how I felt that night and how it’s changed me and what it created for the women in my community, at my church, and how it was embraced and how I know that people were moved by that testimony.

And so one moment with God turns into 50 women in a room who then turns into all of their acquaintances who then turns into–all of it just multiplies out. And so as people listen to this, I would just encourage you that one moment can turn into an influence or a ripple effect of hundreds or thousands or more. So not to discount a moment and how powerful it is for you, but how powerful the retelling of that can be for other people.

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